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This karaoke version has been produced by Zoom Karaoke and the recording rights are owned and controlled by Zoom Entertainments Limited - Song lyrics: WHO IS IT? WHO THE FUCK IS ALICE? YOU CAN’T HAVE A SHIT IN PEACE WHERE’S THE FUCKIN’ PAPER BASTARD! SALLY CALLED THE OTHER DAY I’VE GOT SOME NEWS YOUR MATE BERT’S GAY I COULD NOT BELIEVE HE’S CALLED HIMSELF FUCKIN’ ALICE SHE SAID IT HAPPENED AROUND THREE O’CLOCK HE JUST CAME OUT OF THE CLOSET HE’D HID HIS COCK AND SHE WAS SHOCKED AND UPSET MIND, THEY HAD ON THE SAME FROCK I DON’T KNOW WHY HE’S LEAVIN’ OR WHY HE HAS TO GO I GUESS HE’LL HAVE HIS REASONS I MIGHT ASK HIM FOR A BLOW TWENTY-FOUR YEARS I’VE BEEN LIVING WITH BERT WHO’S NOW ALICE ALICE, WHO THE FUCK IS ALICE FOR TWENTY-FOUR YEARS HE’S BEEN WAITIN’ FOR A CHANCE TO DRESS UP IN WOMEN’S CLOTHES AND BE ASKED TO FUCKIN’ DANCE GOT TO GET USED TO CALLIN’ MY MATE BERT FUCKIN’ ALICE WE GREW UP TOGETHER BUT HE HAD A ’TACHE HE WORE SPARKLY CLOTHES THE CUNT WAS FLASH AT SIXTEEN YEARS OLD I LAUGHED FOR HE WAS LOSIN’ HIS HAIR I MUST WRITE TO HERBERT AND TELL HIM THE NEWS I CAN’T LOOK AT A CUCUMBER NOW THANK FUCK WE’RE NOT JEWS MIND YOU, IN THE SHOWER, BERT I MEAN ALICE HAD A WONDERFUL PAIR I DON’T KNOW WHY HE’S LEAVIN’ OR WHY HE HAS TO GO I GUESS HE’LL HAVE HIS REASONS I MIGHT ASK HIM FOR A BLOW JOB FOR TWENTY-FOUR YEARS MY MATE, BERT IS NOW FUCKIN’ ALICE FOR TWENTY-FOUR YEARS HE’S BEEN WAITIN’ FOR A CHANCE TO DRESS UP IN WOMEN’S CLOTHES AND BE ASKED TO FUCKIN’ DANCE NOW I’VE GOT TO GET USED TO CALLIN’ BERT FUCKIN’ ALICE SALLY CALLED BACK ASKED HOW I FELT SHE SAID THE BASTARD’S PISSED OFF WITH ME BLOUSE, SKIRT AND BELT HE’S LEFT ALL THESE FUCKIN’ SMOKIE RECORDS THAT I HAVE TO SELL WHAT A CUNT! SHE SAID, I FEEL QUEER I SAID, HEY, SO DOES HE WELL, HE DOESN’T KNOW I’M A LESBIAN, YOU SEE FOR TWENTY-FOUR YEARS I’VE HID ME BATTERIES, ME WHIP ME JACKBOOTS I’VE GOT A KEN AND KEN DOLL IF HE COMES BACK HE’S ALRIGHT DON’T KNOW WHY SHE’S LEAVIN’ OR WHERE SHE’S GONNA GO I GUESS SHE’S GOT HER REASONS BUT I JUST DON’T WANNA KNOW ’CAUSE FOR TWENTY-FOUR YEARS I’VE BEEN LIVIN’ NEXT DOOR TO ALICE ALICE, WHO THE FUCK IS ALICE TWENTY-FOUR YEARS JUST WAITIN’ FOR A CHANCE TO TELL HER HOW I FEEL AND MAYBE GET A SECOND GLANCE BUT I’LL NEVER GET USED TO NOT LIVIN’ NEXT DOOR TO ALICE ALICE, WHO THE FUCK IS ALICE NOW I’VE GOTTA GET USED TO CALLIN’ BERT ALICE I CAN JUST SEE HIM FUCKIN’ HIGH-HEEL PIT BOOTS ON OLD DONKEY-DICK WHAT A IDIOT I TELL YA WHAT HE CAN KEEP AWAY FROM OUR FUCKIN’ HOUSE OR I’LL GIVE HIM THAT RIGHT ON THE FUCKIN’ SNOUT
