Burning Man attendees finally escape festival

Tens of thousands of hippies, completely unequipped to deal with the Mad Max scenario they’ve found themselves in recently, have finally begun leaving this year’s disastrous Burning Man festival. Footage from Tuesday shows the mass exodus in full swing, after unexpected mud left the hippies stranded for days with dwindling food supplies and serious damage to their chakras. Traffic began flowing from the event on Monday, although event organizers warned of five hour wait times, and urged visitors to delay leaving in an attempt to ease the gridlock. The remaining attendees are now stuck in a mere 2-3 hour wait to exit, and are hopefully not passing the time with loud renditions of folk songs on their poorly tuned ukuleles.