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Bardic inspiration [Guard #1] Eat up maggots! Extra spit. Just the way you like it. Sad? Write a song about it. [Antrius] How do we end up inside of these walls? And what is this punishment for? Apart from the murder and burning and pillaging, stabbing and slaughtering? Sure. We just wanted glory and fame. Now we eat from a bucket and poop in a bucket too. So much undone, what a shame. So many NPC's we haven't stuck it too. But I will not die before I've laughed. I can't deny the world my shaft. This jail is rather understuffed. I may not be brave like a fighter, or magic, or strong, But sometimes the key can be found in a song. Get it? Key. Ha! I kill with charisma and cool captivation, Belting out bars of Bardic Inspiration! [Nixie] What's Bardic Inspiration? [DM] Oh, it's this ability he got at 1st level, just hadn't used it till now. Essentially he can improve your chances of success. [Nixie] Huh. [Evandra] Believe it or nor, some people actually find his music inspiring. [Antrius] I'm the hardiest, bardiest bard. Antrius brings salvation. Timing and tenderness, terribly talented, Topped with a bit of alliteration. [Evandra] Ahem! [Antrius] Sorry. Evandra with her mighty strenght Of many men goes to any length She throws a fist, she'll leave you in a daze. ([Evandra] I'll leave you in a daze!) And Nixie says concerning things But mostly end up burning things, But that's still cool. She'll se the world ablaze. ([Nixie] I'll thet the world ablathe!) A fireball. Surprising. [Guard #2] Why do I hear harmonizing? Why is he on his back? [Antrius] Spontaneous heart attack. [Guard #2] What? [Antrius] Spontaneous heart attack. [Guard #2] Ok, well explain the fire. [Nixie] [club118700523|*explains] the fire* [Antrius] When you're done and you're out And there's problems aplenty, You'll always come through With a natural 20. Ready to face All the foes in our way. But anyone Can be undone By any 1... But not today! [Guards] [club77227242|*getting] what's coming to them* [Antrius] Doesn't this slap? Damn! Best song I ever wrote. Helping my best friends Punch a guy in a throat. So on our game. Look at us go. No “I“ in team. There is “A“ though. Which stands for Antrius! Badily badibly bapbidly bapbapbap. Fighting valiantly for our cause. [Evandra] Swords and metal can settle scores. [Nixie] Thcreamth can thound tho muth like applauthe! Just clothe you eyeth. [Evandra] Everyone dies! [Antrius] We're products of our milieu. We're sexy but we'll kill you. Everything's broken and charred! We're Half-elf, Pink, and the Bard. [Guard #1] Am I dying? [Antrius] Slip into bliss. You can rest in my hands. No more on this Mortal coil shall you dance. [Guard #1] I see a light. [Antrius] Walk towards it then! You'll never see your ugly children again. [Guard #1] What? [Antrius] Or your awfull wife, or your tiny house, Or your measly food, or your tacky goblets, Or your cracked crockery and dishes. [Guard #1] Why? [Antrius] My mockery is vicious. [Guard #1] *dies from 1d4 psychic damage* [Party] When you're done and you're out And there's problems aplenty, You'll always come through With a natural 20. Ready to face All the foes in our way. But anyone Can be undone By any 1... But not today! [Antrius] We'll allways pass the test No matter how we've vexed. And now? Another quest! Where should three heroes go next? [DM] That's not really how this ability works... But okai, I'll allow it.
