These microscopic bugs are having sex on your face while you sleep, says new study

Did you know you’re hosting nightly orgies without your knowledge? According to researchers, a horde of microscopic lotharios do the deed in your skin pores while you sleep. Demodex folliculorum mites (sexy name) make their homes on human faces, eyelashes and nipples, moving between follicles in search of a mate. And a new study by a team at the University of Reading suggests they might be about to get even more intimate with us. According to the study, inbreeding is causing the mites to shed genes and cells, meaning they could soon devolve from external parasites to ‘symbionts’ that are actually part of us. Although you should take comfort in the fact that, for every pair getting it on, there are probably a few getting friend-zoned. If you listen very closely you might even hear a barely audible ‘It’s not you, it’s me.’