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Bo Burnham - Eat a Dick

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[Girl] It’s over We shouldn’t fight to stay together just to fight again It’s over We’re unhappy We need to take a break from us to make us right again And even though it’s not gonna go any further I swear I don’t regret a second of it And when the dust has settled I hope we can still be friends [Bo] And then I said EAT A DICK! EAT A DICK! EAT A FUCKING DICK, LIKE THIS! PUT ON YOUR DICK EATING GLOVES! GET READY TO GOBBLE A DICK OFF! IF YOU DON’T LIKE THIS DICK, BITCH EAT A DICK, BITCH! ...You think i’ve made the right decision? [Girl] Okay, you’re angry I can see that But you don’t need to make this harder than it has to be I try to speak to you But you won’t listen- [Bo] EAT A DICK! [Girl] Hold on, please just let me- [Bo] BUT EAT A DICK! [Girl] Oh my God Honestly, are you fucking five? I’m trying to talk this out, and you refuse to even listen to me I’m saying how I’m feeling, okay? And then you’re saying... \“eat a dick\“ over and over again Does that seem mature to you? [Bo] NO IT DOESN’T! BUT SEE I THINK THE ISSUE IS I’VE GOT MY FATHERS’ TEMPER AND I’M EMOTIONALLY INARTICULATE! SO RATHER THAN BEING HONEST AND VULNERABLE I DID A QUICK SWITCH CAUSE I’M HURTING INSIDE I’M TRYING TO HIDE IT SO EAT A DICK, BITCH! [sobbing] I thought t we had a future, you fucking whore [Girl] I didn’t think you’d cry for me I didn’t think you cared I thought you were lashing out in anger Now I see you’re scared I’m scared, too Maybe we can work this out And not break up [Bo] Really? [Girl] NO, LICK MY CLIT! LICK MY MOTHERFUCKING CLIT! YOU THINK THREE LOUSY TEARS OFFSETS THREE YEARS OF SHIT I DESERVE BETTER THAN YOU GET ME WET AND THEN SCREW SORRY YOU’RE NOT WHAT I NEED, HUN LICK THIS CLIT AND LEAVE, SON

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