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(0:06) Lecture topic (0:34) A little on Todd’s background (2:18) Key Points (2:20) How to win? (2:22) The first principle of winning - You have to decide to win (4:22) If you’d rather be “comfortable“ over winning? (4:38) Samples from the previous game (Game and Life) (11:31) Getting the number and not following up (14:54) Was hanging out with some of my music idols Thursday night. They’re all-stars in the studio, but most of them froze up on a wall when we hit the bar. Not a question, just more of a Todd appreciation post. The game is the great equalizer. Keep at it guys. (15:08) In your opinion, where’s the line between being optimistic & focusing on winning, and being realistic about what’s possible? Like whether or not it’s a winnable situation. (18:18) Can you post the “playing to win” part of this video to YouTube with some motivational music and images? (18:25) Hey Todd. Usually 1-2x week I have a bad night where I’m not having fun. It feels like I’m going up to sets with an “empty cup,” as in I have nothing to offer. As I walk up I kind of expect a negative result/expect to get blown out. And it turns into a bit of a self-fulfilling prophecy. I was really struggling to snap myself out of this last night and ultimately couldn’t. I wanna say this goes a bit further than just being out of state but I’m not sure how to fully articulate it. I’m not completely sure if it’s not wanting to win also, because at a certain point it feels like everything will be a blowout, so why try? It feels like I’m going through the motions. My question to you is this: 1. General recommendations for this and 2. If we were in boot camp what would you literally have me do? (22:50) How do you go for the girls that we really want? When you have to do an approach and you think “oh, she’s cute“ instead of “Go Approach“. (25:01) Do you believe there are times when winning is not worth risking losing what you already have? ( In game and life) (25:23) What do you think about a case like the 2014 World Cup where the German team’s coach supposedly advised his team not to score much more in the second half so the germans could come home safe, without getting attacked by the locals? How does that relate to winning, wanting to dominate your opponent, and taking a risk to make a good situation great? Like making a good set great, etc. (26:14) How do differentiate between I want to win the game and I want to get this specific girl? The latter is not a good mindset, but I often feel that. (29:08) Note on putting your face on the calls (29:21) How to bring up family/friends who are self-sabotaging or just generally losing? In my experience, it’s rarely worked and has taken lots of my time and energy. (30:26) Can you talk about why people experience emotional limitations and not just physical ones? (31:29) How do you deal with self-doubt when you decided that you want to win a game, but then you keep losing and you’re not sure if it’s possible to win anymore? Especially if your self-doubt is reinforced by the opinions of others. (34:37) How to have the willingness to walk away, while still wanting to win? It seems contradictory. (35:18) Any examples in game (apart from learning it) where in the set itself you might have to go ’backward’ for a bit in order to keep going forward in the long run? (35:56) The second principle of winning - Don’t lose or don’t beat yourself. (43:59) When should I do a risky move? When I’m losing? (44:59) Some of these things you’re talking about are intuitively obvious to me, like following the girl to the bathroom in a good set when most guys would be afraid of being needy. But with other things you talk about, I’ve for sure struggled in the past. So it’s weird consuming this lecture like that. (45:20) The third principle of winning - Know the game you’re playing (55:05) (Live follow-up question) I was at the supermarket and there was a huge line. So what I did was I just went ahead of the entire queue and I found a much, much shorter one. So it was like a 4-person queue as opposed to a 50-person one. Can you talk about why anyone would wait for so long when there was an easier option for them? (59:14) In your opinion, should you be selfish about winning in game and life, and how do you deal with guilt and shame when you want to win or when you’re already winning? There were times when I decided to win but was telling myself that I am being selfish and immoral for some reason. An example would be cutting off old friends from your life, or potentially ruining a girl’s night by doing the bad game. (1:02:29) Stop the housing market - the rule introduced post-2008. (1:02:36) It’s also fun to play inside the gray area of rules. (1:05:35) The book is Tipping Point.
