US State Department laughs about invading countries

The foremost comedic institution in the US, the State Department, has released its latest special. MC and spokesman Matthew Miller began the event with some classic comedy material about Israel. ‘People often tend to forget that Israel, like other countries in the region, is a sovereign country that makes its own decisions,’ said Miller, with the classic deadpan expression we’ve come to expect. He continued: ‘The United States does not dictate to Israel what it must do, just as we don’t dictate to any other country what it must do.’ Enter a special guest star from the Associated Press, Matt Lee, to deliver the coup de gras. ‘Unless we invade them.’ Oh how everyone laughed. Except the following (non-exhaustive) list of countries: Afghanistan, Bosnia, Cambodia, El Salvador, Grenada, Korea, Haiti, Honduras, Iraq, Laos, Libya, Nicaragua, Somalia, Vietnam, and the former Yugoslavia.