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*SEE CONTENT NOTE IN VIDEO DESCRIPTION* What if the Phoenix Wright games... had lyrics? Get Brentalfloss t-shirts and merch HERE: Get the song from this video wherever digital music is sold/streamed! Also, I MADE A PARTY GAME FOR CONSOLES! It’s called “Use Your Words,“ it’s now available for all current consoles/Steam/the Wii U, and it’s fun! More info at Special thanks to my friend Jeff Brenneman who helped with this one! And HEY, you can follow me on Twitter if you like! -------------- LYRICS: MORAL KOMBAT! In the near future, courts of law go super fast There's no jury, just a judge Gotta win in three days max My name is Phoenix Wright, and I'm an ace attorney So grab a seat, groove to the beat, and join me on my journey I live in California, and by that I mean Japan Got a suit of blue, a big red tie and hair like Gemini Man It's a comedy of errors with the violence of Macbeth So cute and charming (MURDER!) Zany, wacky, jokey (DEATH!) Yeah, I meet all kinds of weirdos on my justice-seeking quest, The dudes are total dicks, and the ladies have big breasts! Come on, y'all! DICKS! BOOBIES! DICKS! BOOBIES! DICKS! BOOBIES! BOOBIES! DICKS! DICKS! BOOBIES! DICKS! BOOBIES! DICKS! BOOBIES! BOOBIES! DICKS! Uhh... boobies? I'm rated T for teen and even one time rated M But I've got pop culture chops, and each reference is a gem If you have a big *OBJECTION* to where I'm coming from, You can *TAKE THAT*, *HOLD IT*, and shove it up your bum My name is Phoenix Wright, I'm a semi-decent lawyer With the help of magic stones and my hot/dead employer So court is now in session, Judge Santa Claus presiding If a witness has a secret, I will find out what they're hiding Pressing and presenting, I will find a resolution, Fighting liars on the stand (and the kinky prosecution) My client isn't guilty, which I'll prove with my defense, So now all I have to do is choose the perfect evidence, Here we go! *OBJECTION* (Nope) *OBJECTION* (Nope) *OBJECTION* (Nope) Guilty! *OBJECTION* (Nope) *OBJECTION* (Nope) *TAKE THAT!* Not guilty ... obviously. --------------------------- CONTENT NOTE: When I wrote this, I didn't think much about the effect of that final use of the word “boobies“ in context. In retrospect, it could come off as transphobic, and I'm definitely not that. Sorry if it made anyone feel bad, that wasn't my intention.
